Whiskey Lullaby
by Ravenfire385
Summary: When Kaoru leaves Kenshin, he's heartbroken. When he finds no other answer, what is his final action? Songfic. Rated for suicide...


Whiskey Lullaby

-I don't own Rurouni Kenshin…or anything by Brad Paisley-

_She put him out_

_Like the burning end of a midnight cigarette_

_She broke his heart_

_He spent his whole life trying to forget_

Crack. "Why didn't you tell me?!" Tears in her eyes, Kaoru stormed away from the red-haired rurouni, a red handprint surfacing on his cheek. His wide violet gaze quivered and broke, turning from his second love.

"Kaoru…" his whispered, reaching out. His hand touched her sleeve, but she jerked away.

"Don't touch me!" she yelled. "You monster! Why didn't you tell me you were the Hitokiri Battousai?! You're the reason my father's dead!" Kenshin's gaze narrowed despite his heartbreak.

"This is why I didn't tell you." The man said, his voice calm. "I was afraid of your reaction." When the raven-haired woman did not respond, he turned away. "This one will be getting his things, then." Picking up his sakabatou, the rurouni walked out of the dojo gates. Kaoru, for the first time in her life, didn't try to stop him.

_We watched him drink his pain away a little at a time_

_He never could get drunk enough to get her off his mind_

Sanosuke watched in concern as Kenshin downed another gulp of sake. His friend had been drinking the better part of two weeks.

"I think you've had enough, Ken." He said, trying to take the bottle of rice wine away from the fiery-haired man. When a low growl emanated from him, Sano pulled back.

"I'll know when I've had enough, thank you." The cold, eerily steady voice did nothing to dispel Sano's fears. Only when another voice said coolly, "Sanosuke's right, Himura. Give me the bottle." Kenshin did not fight this man.

"I can still think of her." He said dully. Amber flecked violet eyes met slightly concerned blue ones. Aoshi said nothing.

_Until the night_

_He put the bottle to his head and pulled the trigger_

_And finally drank away his memories_

Kenshin sat alone. In the middle of the dojo floor there was a sword. Wrapped in silk, the wakizashi gleamed in the dim light. The only reason Kenshin was there was because he had sneaked in before Kaoru had locked it for the night.

Sanosuke and Aoshi had dragged him from the tavern several hours ago. Depression had set in, heavy and overwhelming. His mind made up, Kenshin kneeled on the cushion in the center of the floor.

_Life is short_

_But this time it was bigger_

_Than the strength he had to get up off his knees._

Kenshin raised the wakizashi, placing the tip on his bare chest. His navy blue gi, his Ishin Shishi uniform hanging on his bony frame, hung at his waist. Violet flecked amber eyes looked up bitterly as Aoshi slammed into the dojo.

Normally icy blue eyes widened in surprise. "Himura, please listen to me." The man pleaded, taking in the sight of the wrapped wakizashi. "We can talk about this. It doesn't have to be like this."

_We found him with his face down in the pillow_

_With a note that says, _

"_I'll love her 'til I die."_

"I have no other reason for life, Shinomori. I loved her with my life. And now that she doesn't love me, I have no life." Kenshin's voice did not quaver. Cold and steady, it betrayed his next action. Even as Aoshi lunged forward, Kenshin plunged the wakizashi into his chest, twisting it even as his face contorted in agony.

In his last second of life, the former Hitokiri Battousai's features smoothed and became emotionless. Truly amber eyes stared up at Shinomori Aoshi as he turned the warm corpse over.

"I thought I heard voices. Are you alright, Aoshi?" Megumi blanched. "Kenshin! Oh god…" she rushed over, pulling the short sword from his chest. "Sanosuke! Get Misao and Kaoru! Now!!" her eyes took in everything: from the Ishin Shishi uniform to the daisho tucked into his obi.

Kaoru burst into the dojo, her face pale. Upon seeing what had happened, her face became stony.

"Look at what that monster did to my dojo." She gritted out, seeing the blood pool around Kenshin's corpse. Megumi and Yahiko turned to stare at her incredulously. Yahiko leaped for her, his bokken extended. Megumi got there first. With a resounding crack, eerily similar to the one following Kenshin's slap, the doctor hit Kaoru fiercely.

_And when we buried him beneath the willows_

_The angels sang a whiskey lullaby._

The small group looked on in sadness. Tears fell from eyes normally dry. Engraved on the headstone were the words:

'Caring man

Loving family member

Missed for eternity'

"Baka deshi…" a usually strong voice cracked. "You did what you thought was right, I suppose…everybody loved you, you know. Remember what you said to me once, when I was teaching you the final secret? You said every bit of sake you tasted was like blood…maybe it tastes good now. You're free from your sins." Hiko unstoppered his jug of sake, pouring a fair amount over the gravestone.

_The rumours flew_

_But nobody knew how much she blamed herself._

_For years and years she tried to hide the whiskey on her breath_

Kaoru scrubbed at the reddish stains on the dojo floor. Even as she did, memories flashed through her mind: Kenshin laughing as he played with Ayame and Suzume; Kenshin defending her from so many people; Kenshin 'oro'ing after she bonked him.

Tears rose to her eyes and fell silently. Kaoru dropped the brush and rocked back on her heels, wiping at her tears with the heels of her hands. She missed him, gods she did.

"I'm so sorry, Kenshin…" she wept. "I was too stuck in my anger I didn't think of how much that would have hurt you…" the scrubbing forgotten, she got up and staggered out of the compound.

The group found her with a cup of sake in her hand.

_She finally drank her pain away a little at a time_

_But she never could get drunk enough to get him off her mind_

Megumi and Misao watched in worried silence as Kaoru gulped the harsh sake down. Eyes half lidded and unfocused, she tried to pour more, but the bottle slid from her fingers. Misao caught it quickly.

"You're done, Kaoru." Megumi said sternly, pulling the girl up. She didn't fight as the doctor changed her and set her in her futon. Kaoru was asleep the moment she was on the thin mattress.

_Until the night_

_She put that bottle to her head and pulled the trigger_

_She finally drank away her memories_

Kaoru stared at the wakizashi. It was exactly the same as the one Kenshin had used. She picked it up, sniffling as tears fell like rain from her sapphire eyes. Reaching up, the girl cut an X into her cheek.

"Kenshin…" she whimpered, tears mixing with the blood. The pinkish liquid dripped down her neck.

When Misao burst into the dojo, she halted. This was so similar to Kenshin's death, she thought belatedly.

"Aoshi!!" Misao screeched. A moment later, she said carefully to Kaoru, "Put the wakizashi down, Kaoru. Maybe we can talk this through?" Aoshi, Sanosuke, and Megumi hurried into the training building.

_Life is short_

_But this time it was bigger_

_Than the strength she had to get up off her knees._

Kaoru's tears only fell faster as she whispered, "It's my fault he's dead…I didn't listen to him…"

"Kaoru, set the knife down. We can work this out." Megumi said tightly, her own eyes starting to fill with tears. Misao fell to her knees as the raven-haired woman only shook her head. Sanosuke started forward, but Aoshi grabbed his collar. Megumi pleaded, "You know we can deal with this some other way, Kaoru. Would Kenshin want you to die?!"

"Kenshin would want to live!" Kaoru snapped. "I killed him, Megumi…I can't live with this blood, not on my hands."

_We found her with her face down in the pillows_

_Clinging to his picture for dear life_

Before anyone could say anything else, Kaoru plunged the wakizashi into her heart. As she twisted it viciously, an expression of freedom entered her face. On that night, rain began to fall.

Thunder crashed and lightning flashed. The group could have sworn the thunder was yelling, and the lightning was yelling back.

'It must have been my imagination.' They all decided silently. Sanosuke mutely picked up Kaoru, setting her on a towel. The group began to scrub the blood from the floor, intent on cleaning it up before Yahiko woke up and saw the mess.

_We laid her next to him beneath the willow_

_While the angels sang a whiskey lullaby._

The next day, everyone stared at the new grave. Right next to Kenshin's, a headstone had been erected. Written on it:

'Loving woman

Caring teacher

Kind mentor

In our hearts forever'

_Owari_

-I apologize for any OOCness in this…it's kind of hard to keep them in character. Please read and review…anything accepted.-


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